Safe

June 24, 2018

My daughter and I spent the afternoon at the beach with my Dad. It was a really peaceful afternoon without the pressure of competing conversations or an audience watching the dynamic between the two of us.

My Dad shared that he had a wild past…I mean a seriously wild past! My lack of rebellion was an embarrassment compared to his wild ways and tales of mischief. He did say once I take the family name the wild may begin since it’s in the genes!

I shared with him that I was a rule follower and I really had not ever been “wild.” He then asked me to tell him more about me. This was one of the first times he had asked me about my past. He asked if my parents were loving. I shared my history beginning with my Mom giving birth to me but never being allowed to see me or hold me. He flinched when I shared what my Mom had experienced obviously feeling the pain my Mom must have felt.

I went on to share the abuse, my struggle to get pregnant, meeting my biological Mom and my panic attacks. I shared my eventual estrangement from my adopted parents and adopted brother.

His words to my history – you are safe. You will always be safe with me.

#ancestry, #hawaii, #DNA, #adoption, #pineappleprincess360, #thisisreal

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